You see the thing is, I never let people see my overwhelming insecurities that suffocate and poison me from inside. I don't let people see how much missed opportunities, forgotten friendships, and abandoned invitations really faze me. It is a lot easier to pretend I don't feel conveniently needed. A lot easier to think I'm the replaceable name in the guest list than wondering why didn't they invite me too. It is simpler to act unfazed about it instead of admitting that I feel like a forgotten shadow of a ghost that was once an important part of someone's life.
To he honest, I would rather let people think that I'm a cold-hearted, anti-social, "independent" guy than let them bear witness to just how irrelevant I feel on the best of days. I think I will choose to hide behind the dark tinted window than show my true feelings.